Faded Gold
by tharah
Summary: Sequel to Bleeding Hope. Even a tragic murder can sometimes have a greater reason behind it...and every emotion is not what it seems.


_Disclaimer: As usual, I don't own Slayers in any way, shape, or form. (I only wish I did) I'm just a poor college student writing to keep my sanity._

Decided to do a follow-up to Bleeding Hope, this time from Lina's POV. This is probably ooc, but if you dislike ooc, don't read this. This follow-up is dedicated toBibliomaniac, who asked for a follow-up.

* * *

_: Long before this world had rules... We wandered together.  
Far beyond time's first tick... We kissed in the moonlight. :_

It had all seemed so simple in the beginning. She had her friends and she knew her place in the world, two things many couldn't claim. It wasn't an easy life, but she wouldn't have enjoyed it without the challenge. Even her companions had been exciting in their own way, each a puzzle to unravel and discover. By the time they'd gone their separate ways, she thought she'd figured everything out.

The others had paired off. Everyone expected her to go with the swordsman, even herself. Yet to love is to leave. You can't ask a mortal to fight with a god, and she couldn't ask a man with no matching weapon to fight at her side. It wasn't that she doubted his skill, but sometimes skill alone simply isn't good enough. Watching him leave with another match had been hard, but somehow she knew he would live longer.

Years blew past like falling snow, blinding and cold when faced alone. Was it so hard to imagine that she might want a bit of love as well? A bit older, a bit wiser…she didn't need to hide her emotions behind a fiery curtain. By then there was only one other left, another stuck wandering as she was. It didn't take a scholar to realize they'd eventually run into each other again. They were both drawn to conflict after all, it was the very job they lived for.

A battle was fought, she among those fighting on the front line, he among the back rows merely observing. By the last night they were alone, deciding to have a casual talk even as the others were taking their final rest. It would have been odd, had it been anyone but them. Talk of the past eventually turned into talk of the future. A single goodbye kiss was intended to prove that they didn't need love or emotion…but then the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

_: Then many others came and went, and yet we still stood together.  
Many lives were gained and lost, during countless bloody wars. :_

The other friendships had died over time, just as all long-distance things tend to. People didn't mean to forget, but life has a tendency to pull you where it will. Even as the others turned to their families, she returned to him. An old, yet odd, friendship was renewed, though it never went further than that. Some things were forbidden even for the likes of them.

Always one to push her luck, she strengthened their friendship. When the assassins started appearing, she hadn't expected him to fight at her side. She was even more surprised when he fought for her. They argued about it for a long time, but in the end, like the swordsman before him, she couldn't get rid of her protector.

The first death came as a surprise. The princess died suddenly one night, safe in her castle, surrounded by loved-ones and protectors. When the chimera died a week later at his wife's funeral, it was obvious the deaths were planned. Unable to get at her, now the assassins killed old friends. The Mazoku, of all people, was the one to comfort her. Eventually tears were replaced by bitter anger, and an old fire was relit.

The third year of war brought her sister. No threats were issued, no commands given. Only a message was relayed, the words straight from the Lord of Nightmares. Instead of praising the chaos she'd caused by waging war, she was told to stop fighting. There was another problem that needed her attention, a single person that had to be killed before an entire race was destroyed.

_: Loves were ignited in a blaze, only to burn to ashes in a heartbeat.  
Tears were shed, for many dead, that were never loved in life. :_

At first she refused, but even she couldn't stand against both her Lord and her sister. Overnight a growing romance was destroyed, though the Mazoku never knew. She picked up the pace, showing enough emotion to drive him onward, but never enough to seem out of character. Suspicion would be deadly, and she of all people knew how easily he suspected things.

The swordsman and his family died when the war reached their home. Fire from the hand of her allies consumed them, and yet she was forbidden to cry. Her role had to be kept, no matter how high the personal cost grew. To slip up now would see more than her own friends dead.Tears would be reserved for when his allies fell, and she would have the emotion to back them up, for he would know if she pretended.

It was never easy to be the last hope for the world. The people she defended cursed her name, not knowing any better. Her supposed allies wanted her dead, knowing what a threat she was. It didn't matter that she fought alongside them. She was forced to ignore personal feelings, instead clinging to a cause even she doubted. Assuming she won, no one would ever know of her role or sacrifice. Such was the burden of power.

_: When all the seas were only glass...I watched you die in my arms.  
Back when death was the final step...First love was found a second time. :_

By spring she realized the drastic choice that had to be made. Threats came everyday, and even the Mazoku couldn't handle them all. To be mortal was a liability she couldn't afford, not if she hoped to win. Switching sides for a good cause wasn't really betrayal though, was it? Even if she became like him, should could secretly fight for humanity…couldn't she?

He chose a quick death for her. Oddly it was the little things, times where he could have chosen to side with his nature, rather than her comfort, that she almost believed she could actually love him. He could have drank her pain, enjoyed her suffering like the finest of meals. Somehow she knew he was refusing every bit of her emotion, choosing starvation as long as the meal came from her. Holding her close, she couldn't feel the staff running through her. She only felt his arms supporting her, heard his voice telling her it would be over shortly. The pounding of her own heart dropped away, along with her sight.

In the distance, through a haze of blood and blackness, she noticed a gold sea. It stood frozen, as if carved from the finest glass or stone. The Lord of Nightmares hovered above it, staring at her as one would to judge another. A deal was made in that instant, before she was pulled away, jerked forward into a new existence.

_: Together we have learned so much, and yet you surpass me.  
You tried to open up my eyes, but your soul chose to deny me. :_

It was sometime after his master died that she knew the end was coming. So many had died on both sides, it was time to give the world opportunity to recover. Even dark lords had to be replaced, just as the heroic knights would be. Together…together they would form a power that would be to easy to abuse. There were already three sides, a fourth wasn't needed.

She tried attacking in the night. Eyes closed, she hoped to finish things without him knowing. This had all been a simple assignment, yet the idea of him knowing she'd betrayed him…it was a pain to deep for even a Mazoku to take advantage of. The woman, the human woman, that had killed so many Mazoku with power far beyond her…that same woman was now a Mazoku herself, yet couldn't kill a single target with all that power. It was a situation that would have made him smile, if only he hadn't been her target.

_: Now I must stand and watch, as you tread the road toward final Night.  
No goodbyes, I will not cry, please take true peace for your own. :_

The war was over now. Even now she could see the last of his army fleeing, though she didn't care where they went. Looking down, she knew he was gone. Leaves of gold and fire coved him, the purple of his hair turned black in the fading sunlight. Closed eyes held a peace they never had during life, and briefly he reminded her of some prince from a story. She was no princess though, and there would be no kiss of life to heal them both.

Standing to one side, she wondered if he would sense her. Could the dead forgive their murderer? One day she would ask him the answer. Hopefully he would wait that long, for he was always the patient one between the both of them. Despite who they were, in many ways he had turned out to be more human than her. Then again, could any mortal able to wield Chaos really be considered human?

Smiling, she faded out, leaving the fresh grave behind. There was still a long road ahead for her. The assignment was finished, but she'd promised to watch over the recovery. She had made a promise at that sea of golden glass. She would save the world one more time, but the Lord of Nightmares would save a single Mazoku in return. She couldn't call him her love quite yet…but some things took more than a lifetime to figure out. With his help, and a bit of forgiveness on both their parts, they would have countless days of vivid gold to figure the rest of it out.


End file.
